would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
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