..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
