Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
Randomize
