oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
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