Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
me + whiskey = a bad person
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
Randomize
