The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Randomize
