u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
