I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
Randomize
