Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
