Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
