love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
