brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Randomize
