There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
