But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
