I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
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