belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
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