So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
You've changed since you got that strap on
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
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