I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
