just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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