I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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