well most of my day revolves around power hour
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
Randomize
