so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
