I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
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