Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Randomize
