Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
