You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize
