I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Randomize
