Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Randomize
