If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
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