we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize
