So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
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