There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
We just shotgunned beers for America
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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