Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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