at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
How's work?
Spinning.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize
