I wish I only lived at night.
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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