therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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