Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(973): View more from New Jersey

look no pants

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(310): View more from California

I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..

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(443): View more from Maryland

One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.

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(720): View more from Colorado

so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass

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(678): View more from Georgia

She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever

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(651): View more from Minnesota

We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players

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(631): View more from New York

I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!

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(703): View more from Virginia

I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.

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(703): View more from Virginia

hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?

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