He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
I think i got beer on your cat.
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