In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Randomize
