his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
