is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
