I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
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