He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
