She just used a chaser for red wine.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
Randomize
