Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Pappa wants mamma naked
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
Randomize
