i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
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