I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Randomize
