She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Randomize
