If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Randomize
