I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Can I color on your dick again?
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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